what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
