What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
