I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
