So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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