miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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