just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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