before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
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my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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