I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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