My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
