The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Randomize
