Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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