Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn star boner night. come get it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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