You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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