I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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