So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Randomize
