quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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