so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
