apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
