I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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