my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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