Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
