I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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