I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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