i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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