I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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