He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
