wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
