Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
