I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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