At least make sure they are 18
Why
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
