Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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