its not stalking. its research.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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