You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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