real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
