come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
