Tell her she can't have a vagina
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
The power of my boobs compel you
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
