at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
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