i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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