so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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