Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
