I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
