She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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