Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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