I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
