Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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