Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
