Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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