I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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