yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
