help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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