Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
