I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
